I don't care what "Robert Sagel" thinks, Halloween is the worst night of the year. It's a lot harder to tell if somebody is going to try and shiv you with a knife when everybody's in fucking costume and not just proxies.
And when I finally manage to contact the guy I want, he wants to meet at a costume party. I mean, sure, he blends in with his leather and his sword, but I look like a homeless guy in a hoodie. Well, I am a homeless guy in a hoodie, but still.
So, some of you (imaginary) readers may think "Oh Ninja, you're incredibly witty, handsome, intellegent and you smell really really good. Why are you on a shitty island in Europe?"
See, when I was younger, I was stupid. Not "ambush a proxy bigger then me" stupid. "Fend off a group of proxies with a kitchen knife" stupid. I would have died several times during that period of time if a bunch of Runners didn't decide to let me tag along.
One of those guys didn't even need to be a Runner. He could "hide" himself from Slim Jim somehow. He could somehow mimic the effects of a perception filter. Proxies could find him fine, sure, but Slendy never seemed to bother him.
I need to find that guy. That was one thing he knew, he probably had plenty more secrets he kept from me. So I'm going to find him and ask him politely about, well, everything.
And if that doesn't work?
I'll say pretty please.
Monday, 31 October 2011
Tuesday, 25 October 2011
A beginning
There's always a new beginning for people like us. I told myself that I wouldn't make one of these blogs. He seems to take more attention to you when you do that. But Too-Tall's already paid too much attention for my liking anyway, so a bit more shouldn't hurt.
Anyway, he knows how to make a fella feel special. Maybe one of these days he's gonna show up with a box of chocolates instead of trying to shove my organs into a box. Then we could all be friends.
Or, y'know, I'd use the opportunity to run far, far away.
So, yeah. Introductions. I'm The Urban Ninja. Seems a bit melodramatic, but using names is stupid. It binds you, it means they can find you more easily. Doesn't really make a difference to Him, but I'll take what I can get.
But I digress. (Hehe, seen me talking all fancy. I'm really making an effort here. I think that's the right word, but if it isn't, then boohoo.) I've come here to ask one simple question. And while more people would see it if I posted it on every single blog that's being Stalked, I've shit to do. So here it is.
What. The Fuck. People.
People on these godamn blogs seem to make the same mistakes over and over and fucking over again. Luckily, after enough people get sense knocked into them, they stop being stupid, but still. It seems to still be the same stuff. "Oh, let's go to the abandoned building. Oh, let's go meet the proxies and sing nursery rhymes. Oh, let's get drunk and wrestle the Stalker." The list goes on.
I've been Stalked for a while. A good long while, in fact. I made all those stupid mistakes, and many many more. I paid for most of them. But when I see people repeating them, it makes me get angry like the hypocrite I am. I could probably list the amount of wise people on one hand. I'm not one of them. I'm experienced. I've been a fucking idiot before, and I've got burned doing it.
The wise people are the ones who don't get burned at all.
Now, onto "Things that annoy me." There's a great deal, but here's one pretty high up on the list.
Groups.
Come on, people. You should know better then this by now. People have said it to you before. Groups are stupid. They may give him more power (may being the word, cause I don't know jack shit) but are more tempting. It's logic. More prey for him. Drive more people to insanity faster. Win-fucking-win.
For me, max group size is three. For travelling groups, I mean. Getting together to have a Stalked "let's get shitfaced party, one night only" would be fine in my book. Mainly because booze, but also because it can feel nice to be part of a big, physical community once in a while.
And now here is where I show myself not to be a jerk. (Well, not all the time. Maybe 92% of the time, granting nearby alcohol.)
I'm currently in the land of bad teeth and crumpets. (Oh, how I miss my homeland and the plentitude of firearms.) If anybody needs help, I may not be against lending a hand. In return for whiskey.
Heh, maybe I should have went to Ireland instead. I can handle more Stalker influence in return for more alcohol. But I've got business to be getting on with, and those proxies staring at me from the other side of the homeless shelter ain't going to beat up themselves.
Anyway, he knows how to make a fella feel special. Maybe one of these days he's gonna show up with a box of chocolates instead of trying to shove my organs into a box. Then we could all be friends.
Or, y'know, I'd use the opportunity to run far, far away.
So, yeah. Introductions. I'm The Urban Ninja. Seems a bit melodramatic, but using names is stupid. It binds you, it means they can find you more easily. Doesn't really make a difference to Him, but I'll take what I can get.
But I digress. (Hehe, seen me talking all fancy. I'm really making an effort here. I think that's the right word, but if it isn't, then boohoo.) I've come here to ask one simple question. And while more people would see it if I posted it on every single blog that's being Stalked, I've shit to do. So here it is.
What. The Fuck. People.
People on these godamn blogs seem to make the same mistakes over and over and fucking over again. Luckily, after enough people get sense knocked into them, they stop being stupid, but still. It seems to still be the same stuff. "Oh, let's go to the abandoned building. Oh, let's go meet the proxies and sing nursery rhymes. Oh, let's get drunk and wrestle the Stalker." The list goes on.
I've been Stalked for a while. A good long while, in fact. I made all those stupid mistakes, and many many more. I paid for most of them. But when I see people repeating them, it makes me get angry like the hypocrite I am. I could probably list the amount of wise people on one hand. I'm not one of them. I'm experienced. I've been a fucking idiot before, and I've got burned doing it.
The wise people are the ones who don't get burned at all.
Now, onto "Things that annoy me." There's a great deal, but here's one pretty high up on the list.
Groups.
Come on, people. You should know better then this by now. People have said it to you before. Groups are stupid. They may give him more power (may being the word, cause I don't know jack shit) but are more tempting. It's logic. More prey for him. Drive more people to insanity faster. Win-fucking-win.
For me, max group size is three. For travelling groups, I mean. Getting together to have a Stalked "let's get shitfaced party, one night only" would be fine in my book. Mainly because booze, but also because it can feel nice to be part of a big, physical community once in a while.
And now here is where I show myself not to be a jerk. (Well, not all the time. Maybe 92% of the time, granting nearby alcohol.)
I'm currently in the land of bad teeth and crumpets. (Oh, how I miss my homeland and the plentitude of firearms.) If anybody needs help, I may not be against lending a hand. In return for whiskey.
Heh, maybe I should have went to Ireland instead. I can handle more Stalker influence in return for more alcohol. But I've got business to be getting on with, and those proxies staring at me from the other side of the homeless shelter ain't going to beat up themselves.
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